#15: My Favorite Part of the Research Paper

     As a part of my Writing 150 class, we were required to write a research paper on a topic that had some relation to our families. I decided to write mine on the strength of bonds between family members, and how family relationships positively and negatively affect lives. My favorite part of this research was the realization of how important it is to experience trials within family relationships. More specifically, I came to learn how important arguments and fights between siblings at young ages are. Below is a small snippet of the part of my research paper in which I discuss the value of relationships between siblings:

Sibling Relationships

The relationship between parents and their children is especially influential in shaping the behavior and mannerisms of individuals; however, the bond between siblings is even more so. Siblings tend to form much stronger and closer relationships because they are the same age, grow up in the same time period, and they are alive for the majority of each other’s lives. Kluger wrote, “Our spouses and children arrive comparatively too late in our lives; our parents leave us too early…our brothers and sisters are with us for the whole journey,” (James). Because siblings grow up simultaneously in the same time period, they are exposed to similar challenges and are able to help one another respond to difficulties. Through that process, they are able to learn the personality of each of their siblings in a very unique and personal way.

            As small children, fighting is very popular among brothers and sisters. As annoying as these petty fights may be, they will later prove to be important. Kluger stated that “the battles that you fight in the playroom are very much dress rehearsals for the way you live your life later” (Klein). While these fights are certainly not fun for either parents or children at the time they occur, they are essential to building strong bonds between siblings. During each fight, both a weak point of one child, and a strong personality trait of another are revealed. The children are able to learn what each other’s weaknesses and strengths are, and how to stimulate these weaknesses and strengths to show. Many are all too familiar with the typical “button pushing” that siblings enjoy. My sister was a professional “button pusher.” She knew exactly what got to me and my siblings, and could phrase things in just the right way, or do exactly what she needed to do to make us furious with her. While she constantly pushed my buttons throughout my childhood, she is the one with which I formed the strongest bond because she was constantly exposed to my weaknesses and strengths.

            Because siblings participate in fighting, they are exposed to every weakness and strength that each child possesses. This is extremely important later in life as the sibling bond continues. Brothers and sisters are able to lean on each other throughout hard times because of the bonds they formed. Whether these difficult life challenges may be troubles with parents or a spouse, siblings are always there to offer advice and support. This is what makes the sibling relationship so unique – siblings know each other the best, and are therefore always there to help each other and can offer the best solutions unique to the strengths and weaknesses of that sibling. In the words of Kluger, “The power of a sibling who knows everything about you, who knows the family you grew up in, who carries half your genes – there’s nothing quite like that” (Klein). Because siblings are constantly exposed to each other’s weaknesses early on in life, they gain a great knowledge on how each sibling responds best to difficulties and which things will not help them.